I, like many of you, woke this morning to hear of the tragedy that has occurred in Japan. I woke at about 2am, as I do from time to time, and logged onto my computer. I don’t normally do that, other than to check my Facebook and see what kind of response I got from my previous evening’s exploits, or to check my email to get an idea of what my workday is going to be like. This morning I clicked on Google randomly and was bombarded with footage, and articles about Japan’s recent plight. Seeing this, I was immediately moved by the imagery of swaying buildings, and people fleeing their homes and office buildings to take what refuge they could find in the open streets. I watched, in disbelief, at the raw power of this natural disaster as it quakes this island nation, sending tsunamis towards the continental United States, Hawaii and many other surrounding nations. Most of all, I saw these fellow human beings clutching their loved ones tightly; staring in disbelief at an invisible predator that was savagely attacking the planet.
I don’t watch the news much, but it seemed the more I watched this footage, the more I craved. I wanted to understand what was happening. I wanted to try to live it as closely as I could. This was a strange reaction for me, as I never really enjoy seeing suffering in any form, and even less, that of my fellow man, and I rarely spend time dwelling on the disasters that occur naturally in this world. It has always seemed to me that things happen for a reason, and that we, as a human race, will pick up the pieces and move on as best we can. This time was different. It seemed to me that this was a call, from a not-so-far-away neighbor, to action.
Even as I write this I realize how sensational this all sounds. I promise I have a point, and I will get to it shortly.
So, I lay there in bed with my laptop on my chest, and I watch, and my soul begins to stir, and I think to myself: “Surely there is something that I can do.” As sure as I think this, here comes the negativity. “What can you do? You are too far away to do anything! They don’t need you, they need professionals!” I could not lie in bed any longer. I got up and moved to the living room and turned on the television. Again I was bombarded with footage and the frantic descriptions given by eye witnesses…and then some weather reports… Really?! This is happening right now! People are dying right now, and you give me weather reports?! I turned off the T.V.
Beside myself, I thought it better that I go back to bed and get some rest. Surely there would be more information later, and opportunities to donate, and benefits that I could encourage, but as I laid there in my bed in the cold dark, I could not shake the impression that it was no mistake that I had awakened when I did. It seemed, to me, so certain that there was a call to action being cast into the sky like a smoke signal. What was the action?
I got back up and decided that I would check my Facebook to see if this information had made its way to my community, and there, in the cold dark, with only the light of my laptop’s screen, I saw, in black and white, what I should have known was the action being called for.
Status after status I saw: “Prayers for Japan,” or, “Sending Japan all my love,” or, “Sending all my positive energy to Japan” or, “May God have Japan in His hands.” It was obvious what the action was, and yet, it seemed too simple. The call to action was love.
I have been a proponent of all humans being connected for quite a while. I do believe that we share a common spark that ignites from within and blossoms into the miraculous and palpable notion that is the human condition. I have worked with the principle, and seen it transform my life into a life of wonder and true joy, but I always felt that belief in solidarity save a few enlightened people that I have been blessed to meet in my travels. Yet there it was, in black and white. Whether or not we know it, we, as human beings do truly, and fundamentally, believe, that we are connected. If not, then why bother with “sending love,” or “praying for the wounded?” Why care from a distance, when there is nothing that we can physically do? I’ll tell you why. No matter what our faith is, no matter what background we come from, no matter our relationship to the party in question, we know, maybe simply on an instinctual level, that we, the guardians of this earth, the offspring of our forefathers, the sons and daughters of generations before, are, and always will be, connected.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Mangod:His Name Was Ben
Long after the apocalypse and the judgment, and the evil part of humanity had been extinguished; the many of us that were still found to be good were given our rewards. They came in many form and size and shape, and meant many things in different ways to all of us. One of the rewards was eternal life, and each of us was given that gift the same as the next. Each of us was changed in form as well, and was no longer bound by our flesh. We became an entity much more fluid and free-flowing, and we were with God and yet part of Him and still Him at the same time. This was our first reward.
Next we were given God-like powers. It’s hard to explain really. We each were given powers like God but yet very different in that we were given the power to change things and see things and understand things, but we could no longer change or affect one another. We, as infinite beings, were, and are still unchangeable.
Next we were asked what other things we would like, heaven or earth to spend our eternity. Some chose heaven and went on to describe their heaven, and God being the Creator of all things made it so. Others chose earth, and these were the nobler few, twelve to be exact, because the earth had been ravaged by war and pestilence and there was centuries of work to do. We did not care, we were eternal. Centuries were nothing now.
Fourthly, God granted us twelve domain over the earth, and promised he would return again one day, and that He expected to be pleased by our works. Then with a clap of thunder and light so bright it burned with an intensity that would have incinerated our human bodies, God was gone. He and the thousands that chose heaven were gone, leaving only us twelve to rebuild and cleanse the body of the earth. We are Mangod, standing below God but above the angels, formerly human, now the keepers of a formerly human world.
Mangod each took our separate part of the world and began to work. We aided the trees in growth, and cleansed the rivers and oceans. We purged the air of the smoke, the smell of rot, and sulfur. The buildings we had built we sunk into the ground where they burned into the cores fiery center. The roads we had made we broke between newly sprouted trees’ roots, and sent blades of grass between until they were consumed by the foliage. The few animals that still existed, came out from their holes and danced rejoicing, and those that were long gone, we created again. Mangod worked for six days (six thousand mortal years), and rested on the seventh, as God had, convened together in our newly made garden.
On the eighth day God returned.
“Mangod,” he said, speaking to us not by voice, as was not needed any longer but through our minds, yet another gift that had been masterfully given and humbly received. “I am pleased with what thou hast done. You have restored the earth to what I had wanted for you.” We rejoiced silently for now our work was done.
“What shall we do now Lord?” we asked, as we certainly knew there was a plan for us. “What will you have us do?” God was silent a good long time and we waited silently knowing that sometimes God answers in His own time. Finally after two days (Two thousand mortal years), God spoke again.
“Mangod,” this time He actually spoke, and the ground quaked and trembled, the animals ran for their burrows and caves, and the rivers stopped running. “I shall create a new lineage. I shall create man again, but I am tired, and will not govern them. You shall come to heaven and you shall govern the new lineage. I am giving over my heaven to you, and I will take leave of this galaxy. Fear not, I will not be too far that I cannot hear you, or reach you if need be.
Mangod rejoiced loudly, and yet I did not. Something within me ached and I fell to my knees weeping wildly. I could not control this, but the thoughts in my mind began to race and I remembered my human years, and how I felt. The emotions that I could not forget. They all called to me and it was as if the earth itself begged that one person may stay that remembered. I became aware that the other had stopped and were standing around me looking startled and agape. We had not seen tears for a very long time. In fact, no one had suffered even one negative thought since we had been changed. God spoke.
“So shall it be.” And the earth cried out to God and thanked him in her way. I knew not what was happening at first until the aching subsided and the tears dried. I moved my hands from my face and saw that all Mangod was gone and stood there only I, and Jesus. He spoke.
“What is your name Mangod, before you were changed, what did they call you?” Jesus was beautiful. His skin was tanned and glowing, and His eyes dripped love and compassion. His robes were of the finest white cloth draped delicately over his body, adorned with gold that seemed afire. I trembled slightly, and realized... I was in human form again. I opened my mouth to ask what was going on, but Jesus insisted His question again. “What did they call you Mangod?”
“They called me Cayden” I said and lowered my head in a show of servitude.
“You need not bow to me here,” said Jesus, “This is your kingdom. When I visit you we stand as equals, for you have proven yourself worthy, after all you were born human, crossed over, and revived a human the same as I. Do not fear me; I am not here to judge you. I am here to make sure you are advised.” I nodded assuredly, and bowed no longer. “The name Cayden I do not like. Permit me to gift you a name in congratulations on your kingdom?” I nodded again, and smiled in the notion that not only was I having fellowship with God manifested, but He would give me a gift he had given only few. The gift of a name. “I shall call you Ben. This in Hebrew means boy.”
At first I scrunched up my face and said it funnily, and the remembering the giver of the name I smiled and said it thankfully.
Jesus began to laugh. It was a beautiful sound, light and airy, full of love and compassion, and like music, waxed and waned, like a symphony.
“I told you already,” he said, “speak plainly with me. “You do not like the name?”
“I do not understand the name.” I said, “I am not a boy at all, I am Mangod, and this form I take now is not that of a boy either. Of all the names you could have chosen, why Ben?”
Jesus drew a breath, and sighed contentedly. I knew He was not mad, but seeking out the perfect words to explain.
“Let us go sit.” He smiled and pointed to an oak tree several meters away, and then crossed in front of me to begin towards it. I followed closely. When we reached the tree, Jesus sat cross legged into the grass, beneath the shade of three hundred year old oak. I sat too, about a foot away, so that I faced the same direction that He did. “Ben come closer,” He said, “Come face me, and be close to me.” I got up quickly and walked to Jesus, and sat cross legged in front of Him so that our knees touched. I could feel our energies mingling where our bodies touched.
Do you remember the human you were before you were changed?” He spoke, and as he did He reached out and put a hand on my shoulder. I nodded. “You were a funny sort. You were so sensitive, and kind and you just loved so deeply.”
“I remember.” I said.
“I watched you closely towards the end because you began to break under the agony that was going on around you. You walked past the dying strangers and wept for them. You refused to kill enemies that threatened your life on many occasions, and it hurt you so badly that they wanted to hurt you. Every lie that you heard broke your heart, and every person that you loved eventually went away. I saw all this, and cared for you so deeply.” He reached out His other hand and cupped my cheek in it. I remembered it all, and I could still feel it all, tugging from the past and causing watery eyes. “Still you chose to stay. Even the earth noticed and loved you as I did and begged my Father to let you stay. You love like a child loves, regardless of condition; in despite of any flaw, and even when they desire your destruction, you love all the same, begging a hug from an abusive father. It’s a childlike love, and that’s why Ben. It’s the love of a God too, and this brings me to my business here.” He retracted His touch and stood slowly, and walked a few feet away facing the horizon that was now host to a sun that would soon succumb. The sky lit up with colors man had not seen in years before the final battle.
“My Father has told you that He is going to create a new lineage.” He spoke slowly and stood still, less the garments rustling in the wind. “You will live among the humans as they grow and learn of Mangod. You will be with them when they turn away from Mangod. It is certain that they will, for they are human and must have free will. They must make their own choices, for a love without choice is not love at all.” He turned to me and looked at me with His dewy eyes, and tender smile. “You cannot openly interfere.” The shock hit me like a swinging boulder.
“I thought this was my kingdom? How can I have this kingdom and not rule it?” The thought saddened me and made me want to cry.
“You can rule it Ben, but you must be careful. A man came in your age and claimed to be God, and they killed him. Sure it was for a purpose, and it will most likely happen again, but it is not your role to play. You must change things silently for your sake and for the sake of those that you will grow to love and call your family.” His answer made sense. I could do so much more if they didn’t know who I was. I could work more efficiently.
“I will keep silent Lord” I said and was satisfied.
Jesus turned away again. “There is more you must know. Another angel has fallen, and as I am sure you know, Lucifer is still hiding, licking his wounds like an injured dog. This time he will have help, and the stakes are higher because my Father will be away for a very long time. Mangod must win the people.”
“Who fell Jesus?” I spoke but it came out a whisper for the weight of this information had shocked me and saddened me. “Why after all we have been through? Why choose now to rebel?”
“I will not tell you who fell. It’s not of importance. He was not happy with the new order. He does not like answering to a Mangod. He would not obey so Mangod cast him out into the pit of despair like his brother before him. I tell you this only because you must understand that the type of evil Mangod is up against is far greater than before. That is why you are eleven in heaven and one on the earth.” He turned to me again and sighed. “Are you sure you want to stay? I can feel your hurt already, and there is no need for it Ben. You can come with me, and govern from above.”
“I think that it will hurt either way, will it not?” I shrugged my shoulders and walked to stand close to Him.
“It will but without all the human emotion that is so drastic.” He put a hand on my shoulder again and I could feel His energy scrubbing away my angst.
“Yes but human love is drastic too and it is the most amazing thing I have ever felt. Human hope is so beautiful. I long to feel those things in the smaller way I felt them before, and I long to walk on this earth. I cannot just leave it alone.” I could feel the blades of grass dance around my bare feet. The air became suddenly aromatic, and perfume-like. I could see the sun get just slightly brighter, and I knew when earth was happy for me to stay. All the more reason.
Jesus smiled so sweetly, and a tear traveled down His cheek. “The love of a child,” He said, “That is why I named you Ben.”
We stood silently there for a long while, with his hand on my shoulder and then around my neck, and watched the sun set, until the moon showed its beautiful face and the rearranged stars sparkled breathtakingly.
“I have to be going soon Ben,” Jesus said as he pulled His arm back to His side. “I have much to teach Mangod.” I could not hide my disappointment for this statement. “I will be back before long, don’t worry.” I nodded my head affirmatively. Jesus spoke again. “Before I go I wanted to ask you a question. Man will be made again the way they were before. A man and a woman in the likeness of my Father. I remember from before…” Jesus stopped as if He could not find the words.
I laughed shortly. “Now it is you that cannot speak plainly with me?” I said with a smile.
“I just do not want you to think that I think any less…” again He stopped.
“ Yes in this form,” I said, “I am still gay.” Jesus’ looked at me with a calculated gaze. “Speak plainly Lord. Please.”
“Ok, I just want you to be happy, and it will be some time before your kind will be understood again. Humans do not like things that are different from them.”
“I understand.” I said.
“ I could change it for you, if that would be something you wanted.” He said, and His eyes, His dewy compassionate, loving, glorious brown eyes stared at me questioningly.
I thought a moment, and stared back at Him again. “I would change if you would have me change Lord. I trust you with my life.” He smiled His big beautiful smile, and spoke.
“I would not have you change. I love you just the way you are, but it is my joy to offer you any happiness in the world. If you are happy loving another man, and do so purely and prudently with respect to each other, and keep Mangod your focus, I will bless any man that chooses to love you Ben.” He turned again toward the horizon, and for a fleeting moment I watched the earth pay her respects to Him and before he disappeared from sight and sound, I heard him say: “Now Ben, sleep.”
Next we were given God-like powers. It’s hard to explain really. We each were given powers like God but yet very different in that we were given the power to change things and see things and understand things, but we could no longer change or affect one another. We, as infinite beings, were, and are still unchangeable.
Next we were asked what other things we would like, heaven or earth to spend our eternity. Some chose heaven and went on to describe their heaven, and God being the Creator of all things made it so. Others chose earth, and these were the nobler few, twelve to be exact, because the earth had been ravaged by war and pestilence and there was centuries of work to do. We did not care, we were eternal. Centuries were nothing now.
Fourthly, God granted us twelve domain over the earth, and promised he would return again one day, and that He expected to be pleased by our works. Then with a clap of thunder and light so bright it burned with an intensity that would have incinerated our human bodies, God was gone. He and the thousands that chose heaven were gone, leaving only us twelve to rebuild and cleanse the body of the earth. We are Mangod, standing below God but above the angels, formerly human, now the keepers of a formerly human world.
Mangod each took our separate part of the world and began to work. We aided the trees in growth, and cleansed the rivers and oceans. We purged the air of the smoke, the smell of rot, and sulfur. The buildings we had built we sunk into the ground where they burned into the cores fiery center. The roads we had made we broke between newly sprouted trees’ roots, and sent blades of grass between until they were consumed by the foliage. The few animals that still existed, came out from their holes and danced rejoicing, and those that were long gone, we created again. Mangod worked for six days (six thousand mortal years), and rested on the seventh, as God had, convened together in our newly made garden.
On the eighth day God returned.
“Mangod,” he said, speaking to us not by voice, as was not needed any longer but through our minds, yet another gift that had been masterfully given and humbly received. “I am pleased with what thou hast done. You have restored the earth to what I had wanted for you.” We rejoiced silently for now our work was done.
“What shall we do now Lord?” we asked, as we certainly knew there was a plan for us. “What will you have us do?” God was silent a good long time and we waited silently knowing that sometimes God answers in His own time. Finally after two days (Two thousand mortal years), God spoke again.
“Mangod,” this time He actually spoke, and the ground quaked and trembled, the animals ran for their burrows and caves, and the rivers stopped running. “I shall create a new lineage. I shall create man again, but I am tired, and will not govern them. You shall come to heaven and you shall govern the new lineage. I am giving over my heaven to you, and I will take leave of this galaxy. Fear not, I will not be too far that I cannot hear you, or reach you if need be.
Mangod rejoiced loudly, and yet I did not. Something within me ached and I fell to my knees weeping wildly. I could not control this, but the thoughts in my mind began to race and I remembered my human years, and how I felt. The emotions that I could not forget. They all called to me and it was as if the earth itself begged that one person may stay that remembered. I became aware that the other had stopped and were standing around me looking startled and agape. We had not seen tears for a very long time. In fact, no one had suffered even one negative thought since we had been changed. God spoke.
“So shall it be.” And the earth cried out to God and thanked him in her way. I knew not what was happening at first until the aching subsided and the tears dried. I moved my hands from my face and saw that all Mangod was gone and stood there only I, and Jesus. He spoke.
“What is your name Mangod, before you were changed, what did they call you?” Jesus was beautiful. His skin was tanned and glowing, and His eyes dripped love and compassion. His robes were of the finest white cloth draped delicately over his body, adorned with gold that seemed afire. I trembled slightly, and realized... I was in human form again. I opened my mouth to ask what was going on, but Jesus insisted His question again. “What did they call you Mangod?”
“They called me Cayden” I said and lowered my head in a show of servitude.
“You need not bow to me here,” said Jesus, “This is your kingdom. When I visit you we stand as equals, for you have proven yourself worthy, after all you were born human, crossed over, and revived a human the same as I. Do not fear me; I am not here to judge you. I am here to make sure you are advised.” I nodded assuredly, and bowed no longer. “The name Cayden I do not like. Permit me to gift you a name in congratulations on your kingdom?” I nodded again, and smiled in the notion that not only was I having fellowship with God manifested, but He would give me a gift he had given only few. The gift of a name. “I shall call you Ben. This in Hebrew means boy.”
At first I scrunched up my face and said it funnily, and the remembering the giver of the name I smiled and said it thankfully.
Jesus began to laugh. It was a beautiful sound, light and airy, full of love and compassion, and like music, waxed and waned, like a symphony.
“I told you already,” he said, “speak plainly with me. “You do not like the name?”
“I do not understand the name.” I said, “I am not a boy at all, I am Mangod, and this form I take now is not that of a boy either. Of all the names you could have chosen, why Ben?”
Jesus drew a breath, and sighed contentedly. I knew He was not mad, but seeking out the perfect words to explain.
“Let us go sit.” He smiled and pointed to an oak tree several meters away, and then crossed in front of me to begin towards it. I followed closely. When we reached the tree, Jesus sat cross legged into the grass, beneath the shade of three hundred year old oak. I sat too, about a foot away, so that I faced the same direction that He did. “Ben come closer,” He said, “Come face me, and be close to me.” I got up quickly and walked to Jesus, and sat cross legged in front of Him so that our knees touched. I could feel our energies mingling where our bodies touched.
Do you remember the human you were before you were changed?” He spoke, and as he did He reached out and put a hand on my shoulder. I nodded. “You were a funny sort. You were so sensitive, and kind and you just loved so deeply.”
“I remember.” I said.
“I watched you closely towards the end because you began to break under the agony that was going on around you. You walked past the dying strangers and wept for them. You refused to kill enemies that threatened your life on many occasions, and it hurt you so badly that they wanted to hurt you. Every lie that you heard broke your heart, and every person that you loved eventually went away. I saw all this, and cared for you so deeply.” He reached out His other hand and cupped my cheek in it. I remembered it all, and I could still feel it all, tugging from the past and causing watery eyes. “Still you chose to stay. Even the earth noticed and loved you as I did and begged my Father to let you stay. You love like a child loves, regardless of condition; in despite of any flaw, and even when they desire your destruction, you love all the same, begging a hug from an abusive father. It’s a childlike love, and that’s why Ben. It’s the love of a God too, and this brings me to my business here.” He retracted His touch and stood slowly, and walked a few feet away facing the horizon that was now host to a sun that would soon succumb. The sky lit up with colors man had not seen in years before the final battle.
“My Father has told you that He is going to create a new lineage.” He spoke slowly and stood still, less the garments rustling in the wind. “You will live among the humans as they grow and learn of Mangod. You will be with them when they turn away from Mangod. It is certain that they will, for they are human and must have free will. They must make their own choices, for a love without choice is not love at all.” He turned to me and looked at me with His dewy eyes, and tender smile. “You cannot openly interfere.” The shock hit me like a swinging boulder.
“I thought this was my kingdom? How can I have this kingdom and not rule it?” The thought saddened me and made me want to cry.
“You can rule it Ben, but you must be careful. A man came in your age and claimed to be God, and they killed him. Sure it was for a purpose, and it will most likely happen again, but it is not your role to play. You must change things silently for your sake and for the sake of those that you will grow to love and call your family.” His answer made sense. I could do so much more if they didn’t know who I was. I could work more efficiently.
“I will keep silent Lord” I said and was satisfied.
Jesus turned away again. “There is more you must know. Another angel has fallen, and as I am sure you know, Lucifer is still hiding, licking his wounds like an injured dog. This time he will have help, and the stakes are higher because my Father will be away for a very long time. Mangod must win the people.”
“Who fell Jesus?” I spoke but it came out a whisper for the weight of this information had shocked me and saddened me. “Why after all we have been through? Why choose now to rebel?”
“I will not tell you who fell. It’s not of importance. He was not happy with the new order. He does not like answering to a Mangod. He would not obey so Mangod cast him out into the pit of despair like his brother before him. I tell you this only because you must understand that the type of evil Mangod is up against is far greater than before. That is why you are eleven in heaven and one on the earth.” He turned to me again and sighed. “Are you sure you want to stay? I can feel your hurt already, and there is no need for it Ben. You can come with me, and govern from above.”
“I think that it will hurt either way, will it not?” I shrugged my shoulders and walked to stand close to Him.
“It will but without all the human emotion that is so drastic.” He put a hand on my shoulder again and I could feel His energy scrubbing away my angst.
“Yes but human love is drastic too and it is the most amazing thing I have ever felt. Human hope is so beautiful. I long to feel those things in the smaller way I felt them before, and I long to walk on this earth. I cannot just leave it alone.” I could feel the blades of grass dance around my bare feet. The air became suddenly aromatic, and perfume-like. I could see the sun get just slightly brighter, and I knew when earth was happy for me to stay. All the more reason.
Jesus smiled so sweetly, and a tear traveled down His cheek. “The love of a child,” He said, “That is why I named you Ben.”
We stood silently there for a long while, with his hand on my shoulder and then around my neck, and watched the sun set, until the moon showed its beautiful face and the rearranged stars sparkled breathtakingly.
“I have to be going soon Ben,” Jesus said as he pulled His arm back to His side. “I have much to teach Mangod.” I could not hide my disappointment for this statement. “I will be back before long, don’t worry.” I nodded my head affirmatively. Jesus spoke again. “Before I go I wanted to ask you a question. Man will be made again the way they were before. A man and a woman in the likeness of my Father. I remember from before…” Jesus stopped as if He could not find the words.
I laughed shortly. “Now it is you that cannot speak plainly with me?” I said with a smile.
“I just do not want you to think that I think any less…” again He stopped.
“ Yes in this form,” I said, “I am still gay.” Jesus’ looked at me with a calculated gaze. “Speak plainly Lord. Please.”
“Ok, I just want you to be happy, and it will be some time before your kind will be understood again. Humans do not like things that are different from them.”
“I understand.” I said.
“ I could change it for you, if that would be something you wanted.” He said, and His eyes, His dewy compassionate, loving, glorious brown eyes stared at me questioningly.
I thought a moment, and stared back at Him again. “I would change if you would have me change Lord. I trust you with my life.” He smiled His big beautiful smile, and spoke.
“I would not have you change. I love you just the way you are, but it is my joy to offer you any happiness in the world. If you are happy loving another man, and do so purely and prudently with respect to each other, and keep Mangod your focus, I will bless any man that chooses to love you Ben.” He turned again toward the horizon, and for a fleeting moment I watched the earth pay her respects to Him and before he disappeared from sight and sound, I heard him say: “Now Ben, sleep.”
Friday, September 3, 2010
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